Personalities in the Single Parent Family

Personality Predicaments is one of the SMORE themes. Here are some thoughts on raising kids as very different personalities.

I raised three children as a single mother, a girl and two boys. They each have a distinctly different personality. I think that would have been the case if I’d had ten children. We are all made with an individual design. It is as if we began as a polished slab of marble and the hand of God reached down and etched a completely unique design into the surface. We may fill the crevices with face powder—if girls or dirt –if boys. Our nature remains permanently carved and we best learn who we are.

As a single mom discerning the GPS, God-given Personality Style, of your children will save you lots of time going down the wrong roads. We used to think it was important to treat each child alike. Now we realize that we must recognize that each child needs to be treated according to her own nature.

Here are some questions to ask your children over dinner. You may be surprised by the discussion they generate.

  1. Do you enjoy making people laugh?
  2. Do you usually make good decisions and are they usually correct?
  3. Do you need time to be alone or would you prefer being with a group?
  4. Do you get bored easily?
  5. Do you analyze your friends and why they do the things they do?
  6. If you were lost what would you do first?

Depending on the child’s personality he will answer these questions very differently. You may want to get a book or personality profiles to complete with your family.

One of my favorite personality specialists is Kathryn Robbins. You can find her at

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