It had been lots of years it’s true but as we drove through the town I remembered still-trying to make one of several life altering decisions. Did I want to move and take a job here? I’d come to look into a possible job at a University. I drove -four hours from home – with my three children and Mother.
I didn’t know what I wanted. It is hard to make a wise decision when your decision-maker seems broken. I was raw from the break-up and confused. My youngest put words to what I wanted to know when he blurted loud enough for all to hear at our local Western Sizzler, “What I want to know is why you married someone who’d go off and leave us like this?”
I was wondering too.
Turned out there was no job offer to decide about in this town – four hours from home. In the months that followed there were many such non-decisions. Eventually I took a job, doing just what I’d wanted to never do-teaching high school English. Mothers do what they must. It was many years before my decision-maker was healed enough to function wisely again.
Be kind to yourself. You are making decisions now that will follow you and your children for years to come.
Take it easy.